mercoledì 20 maggio 2009

Things that I'm not supposed to see...

... but I see anyway.

Like, and it's just a mere example, Faraway Dears only cover.

Setting aside Gackt-san, surely Japanese diet is something else. Keep in mind that the younger one is about 35. I suppose I'll sit here for a while, with my legs carefully and elegantly crossed, my chin in hand, thinking.

I'm not worried. I'm not worried. I'm not worried. etc etc

sabato 16 maggio 2009

"How are you today?"

And it's a Dear asking me that! (just noticed x°°°°°°°°°°D)
Anyway it's strange. Only people far from you (any meaning you will think of is pretty coherent) ask this kind of questions. Or people that doesn't understand you at all.

But, anyway, A DEAR IS ASKING ME HOW I FEEL TODAY! I'm moved. Ok, stop it. Pretty blank, that's how I feel today. But I don't think this would be a proper answer.

(but this was yesterday or two days ago, I can't remember... anyway I answered, and now actually don't remember what exactly I've answered... not that forgetting about post this will bring the Universe to explode, no... but...)

mercoledì 13 maggio 2009

Look at...

... this page, and tell me if it doesn't seem some kind of dejavoux.

Kiiiiiiiidding. I just found funny that the font is almost the same as the... old one.

Wooooooh I've just spotted the myspace link! *going add sacchan to her frrrrrrrrriends*

Girly? Well I should be like that more. It's sooooo funny.

(read: "I'm so pissed off and this feeling is so piling up inside and outside that I've almost became cheerful, by lapping it")

Things I'm currently doing:

- complaining;
- pretending to be studying grammar;
- complaining;
- struggle for memorize some useless kanji for exams that I'll never take(read: "complaining");
- blame the world recession for not allow me to fleeeeee to Japan again any sooner than never.

I'm really on the edge. Not that I'm going to kill my parents or such, I don't know, "change of season" things, but I've had really enough. And thinking that this situation can go on and on and on for WHO KNOWS how many years more... well, it's not that easy.

That, and my parents doing their dirty job a.k.a. PISSING ME OFF with their incredible delicacy, like: "As you get your last salary, give it to me so that if we'll use it if it's needed."


I've worked from 1 to 3/22, my last "month", I had to be paid for 9 hours more coming from the previous month(those faggots REALLY don't know how to count! Amazing!), plus the severance payment made me plan something, as usually people do.

But I've got 561 euros.

I was so speechless. And then, How am I supposed to give all the money to my parents? Am I that crazy? It's not a matter of "help the family" or such bullshits. I'm 25 years old, I'm unemployed, I've got to pay for the phone bills and the sat-tv(a thing that I cannot remove because my mother MUST watch some stupid OLD OLD OLD tv series, but I'm the one to blame here, really), I've just get 561 euros that have already halved because of the bills, and I have to give the change to my parents? And me? I worked for that money, not them. Don't they realize that with them being less FOOL, in the past, maybe I would be graduated by now, away from home, WORKING? Do I have REALLY to remind them that they fucked up my life pretty badly since its beginning? Do I have to make them aware of the pedophile they make me live with for years, without noticing a fucking thing? Do I really have to go that far?

So, I've put on my real self. I'm tired of being the happy fool of the court just to entertain them. I'm sick of this. It's already 17 years of this shit. I didn't beg my mother to have me. I didn't force her in getting together with that idiot of my father, Christ. She knew he was just an idiot, so why? Pity? Oh, thanks, pitiful mother. Look at what you've done.

I'm so tired, I want to go back to Japan but mostly I want to get away from here. I want a job, that would allow me to live and maybe save something, any sum, even the littlest one, just for me. Not for pay for my parents mistakes. And not a job (like the current one) for which I'm not even paid. "Because, in a family, you help each other". Sure. Cool.

mercoledì 6 maggio 2009


... and guess what?


Four years. Repeatedly. On loop. Luckily, files don't get scratches like records/cds.

NO, I can't possibly write just that. Come on.

Uhm, report from tokyo. Yes, I know. But my mood is like your ball falling down a hill close to you and YET you can't catch it. And then, a river/stream/ravine ends the game.

Really, I shouldn't take these things too seriously, I know that much. But geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez my life sucks. Sucks used socks. And that's a bad habit. Mostly for socks that, even if used, surely want to keep their dignity like every other pair of wearable things around your house.

So THINK! before sucking your socks.

You're probably infringing the Geneva Convention.

"to infringe" is the cool verb of the week.

sabato 2 maggio 2009

It escapes me.

But, since there should be a meaning to the...gyaru feeling that the singles covers I've just seen convey, I don't want to question ANYTHING about that, especially because is not even nine a.m., I'm tired, sick, and I have to make bread now.