Long time no see.

The fact is that my life sucks. Pretty bad. And I don't know how to make it a little less crappy. A job will do half the work, tho.

Oh yeah I'm still obsessed with Japan and such (don't know why but I had to point out this xD).

See you.

I so want to run away.

BREAKING NEWS!

.
.
.

I probably like Girl U Need. No, I'm not saying that I love them like Ded Chaplin or other bands on a "similar level"(tho I think Ded Chaplin weren't meant to sink like that D:). Anyway I like (really REALLY like) 5 out of 11 songs. Yeah Make you Groove only makes me IRRITATED x°D, like with Get up... the other songs leave me about cold. I still consider the whole thing a bit... I don't know. Claimless? Maybe it was thought of as a claimless solo thing, I don't know. The thing that pisses me off the most is that is SOOOO NOTICEABLE x°°°°°°°D.


This is just because I can't stop listening to Down to the mirror and I can't explain why.

Why?

I could have lived wonderfully without listening to Faraway single, I know.
The title track is so poor that hurts, but anyway, Oblivious is the b-side, and this time was the second time I've listened to it since the live.
Not that it's such a moving/beautiful song, but I'm restraining from crying with all my might. It's annoying. It's that kind of unexpected crying that it's even more annoying.

GAH.

It reminds me of the last two days spent crying and walking and crying and walking and crying until I saw a Hello Kitty themed Hato Bus, and it was impossible to keep crying with a BIG YELLOW THING COVERED WITH THAT SILLY CAT. The same kind of cry that surprised me on the way back home, I was so desperate. I am so desperate. More than four months have passed but nothing has changed. Nothing. I want to go there again and STAY there.

It's ridiculous, it seems just a child whim, but it's not and every single fucking day I wake up thinking about how I'm wasting my life staying here in this hell when I know perfectly where I should be. And it's even more desperate and much much more ridiculous because I also know perfectly that I'm not in a position to hope for that, because there's no way I could do it. No fucking way. And still I can't think about anything else, and I read of those lucky expats that MADE IT, and I think "They're there, and I'm not. Fuck." It's painful. Totally painful.

"How are you today?"

And it's a Dear asking me that! (just noticed x°°°°°°°°°°D)
Anyway it's strange. Only people far from you (any meaning you will think of is pretty coherent) ask this kind of questions. Or people that doesn't understand you at all.

But, anyway, A DEAR IS ASKING ME HOW I FEEL TODAY! I'm moved. Ok, stop it. Pretty blank, that's how I feel today. But I don't think this would be a proper answer.

(but this was yesterday or two days ago, I can't remember... anyway I answered, and now actually don't remember what exactly I've answered... not that forgetting about post this will bring the Universe to explode, no... but...)

Things I'm currently doing:

- complaining;
- pretending to be studying grammar;
- complaining;
- struggle for memorize some useless kanji for exams that I'll never take(read: "complaining");
- blame the world recession for not allow me to fleeeeee to Japan again any sooner than never.

I'm really on the edge. Not that I'm going to kill my parents or such, I don't know, "change of season" things, but I've had really enough. And thinking that this situation can go on and on and on for WHO KNOWS how many years more... well, it's not that easy.

That, and my parents doing their dirty job a.k.a. PISSING ME OFF with their incredible delicacy, like: "As you get your last salary, give it to me so that if we'll use it if it's needed."

What?

I've worked from 1 to 3/22, my last "month", I had to be paid for 9 hours more coming from the previous month(those faggots REALLY don't know how to count! Amazing!), plus the severance payment made me plan something, as usually people do.

But I've got 561 euros.

I was so speechless. And then, How am I supposed to give all the money to my parents? Am I that crazy? It's not a matter of "help the family" or such bullshits. I'm 25 years old, I'm unemployed, I've got to pay for the phone bills and the sat-tv(a thing that I cannot remove because my mother MUST watch some stupid OLD OLD OLD tv series, but I'm the one to blame here, really), I've just get 561 euros that have already halved because of the bills, and I have to give the change to my parents? And me? I worked for that money, not them. Don't they realize that with them being less FOOL, in the past, maybe I would be graduated by now, away from home, WORKING? Do I have REALLY to remind them that they fucked up my life pretty badly since its beginning? Do I have to make them aware of the pedophile they make me live with for years, without noticing a fucking thing? Do I really have to go that far?

So, I've put on my real self. I'm tired of being the happy fool of the court just to entertain them. I'm sick of this. It's already 17 years of this shit. I didn't beg my mother to have me. I didn't force her in getting together with that idiot of my father, Christ. She knew he was just an idiot, so why? Pity? Oh, thanks, pitiful mother. Look at what you've done.

I'm so tired, I want to go back to Japan but mostly I want to get away from here. I want a job, that would allow me to live and maybe save something, any sum, even the littlest one, just for me. Not for pay for my parents mistakes. And not a job (like the current one) for which I'm not even paid. "Because, in a family, you help each other". Sure. Cool.

Playlist: as...as...as...as...as...as...as...as...as...as...as...as...as...

... and guess what?

As.

Four years. Repeatedly. On loop. Luckily, files don't get scratches like records/cds.

NO, I can't possibly write just that. Come on.

Uhm, report from tokyo. Yes, I know. But my mood is like your ball falling down a hill close to you and YET you can't catch it. And then, a river/stream/ravine ends the game.

Really, I shouldn't take these things too seriously, I know that much. But geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez my life sucks. Sucks used socks. And that's a bad habit. Mostly for socks that, even if used, surely want to keep their dignity like every other pair of wearable things around your house.

So THINK! before sucking your socks.

You're probably infringing the Geneva Convention.

"to infringe" is the cool verb of the week.

It escapes me.

But, since there should be a meaning to the...gyaru feeling that the singles covers I've just seen convey, I don't want to question ANYTHING about that, especially because is not even nine a.m., I'm tired, sick, and I have to make bread now.

Cheers.

DA visual shock.

Usually I don't rant about my anime obsession, my translations or such things (YES! I translate! Shocking ne?), but SEBASTIAN POUNDING A NUN deserves a post here.

SEBASTIAN
POUNDING
A

NUN.

I still haven't decided if this is a win or a fail, but sure it's EPIC.

Yes, Kuroshitsuji is almost old already, but I'm so interested in the RANDOMEST series ever that I prefer to follow ep by ep as I translate it. I mean, this is a light-speed DROP.

And it's annoying, since most of the gags are pretty hilarious, and the plot is intriguing, IF ONLY CERTAIN WRITERS WOULD KNOW HOW TO WRITE, or at least how to keep a decent balance in this shonen/yaoi/romance/decadent/comical/whatever MESS.

Enjoy your moment of fanservice, now:

Gross, lame, both and in loop.

z.e.t.s.u.b.o.u. .s.h.i.t.a.

Uhm, I've done a thing that I REALLY shouldn't have done.

Like, I knew perfectly that that thing sucked, even without listening to it, right? But I grabbed it the same (it was floating somewhere, ya no...).

Well, I'm not done. Not at all. Sure, sometimes I think: "But, exactly how did thist thing take to be done?" I mean, he re-sung the "revised" songs. ALL OF THEM. Yes, I'm doubtful about the time of the recording. Sounds older than just some months ago, especially for his voice's conditions.

Yes, too many "Murder, she wrote" episodes.

What was I saying? Oh, yeah, I'm not done at all (this should be clear at this point XD).

But mostly, the thing that's really annoying me like Hell, is the glared-like-sort-of-anyway-annoying drums, on almost every REARRANGED song.

I need a more deep study on the booklet. By the way, I DON'T have that booklet.

I agree, this laps fangirlism. Deal with it.

.still feeling a shite.

Like... dunno...two months? Well, two months of shite-disguising.

That's all. I'm also listening to Ded Chaplin 1st, and that explains the whole thing better than words. Much better.

Second post of whatever about the trip? Well, since it had that HUGE feedback x°D It will be posted, eventually.

(if I wanted to have some kind of feedback I would have written something more interesting...)

Report in progress...sort of.

Well, at least I'm writing something while weeping on those thousand pics. Ah, and I'm listening to flumpool, too (you must know that, after Tokyo, from the cute kirakira not so poppish Japanese sort of rock band that keep me amused, they became the Melancholy Band. Just to let you know.)

Now, for the serious things that nobody will ever read:
- it will be a non-chronological mess of posts. Deal with it.
- every post will most probably have some kind of title that explains why I sum up all those random thoughts in one thing.
- there will be pics too! Aren't you all excited? I AM!!!

Excuse me, I've got to arrange some old songs to fit pachinko standards.

According to Dears jp news page, also Kagero is on Gladiator Pachinko OST.

Yes, it's already unbelievable that pachinkos have their OWN soundtracks (anyway most of them are actually famous series osts, as you may see on this page), and that they're SOLD AS IT IS A NORMAL THING, but not kagero. Please, NOT KAGERO!

It's frustrating.

Essay: "What did you do during your last holidays?"
Composition: "I've arranged old tunes for Pachinko."

Come on, this LAPS lameness!!!! By two or three times!!!!

Breaking news: GHOST sucks X°D

Ah, I knew it.

The cm was too much explicative(if this is even a word) already.

There was this ENORMOUS wall in front of me, while I was listening. ENORMOUS, can you figure it? A big big wall.

A big one.

Ah, so sad. Nevertheless, Jesus is way way way much a better song "comparing" the two. Yeah I know this is useless, but COME ON! What the hell is that? Is it for this...? That we've waited this much?

I'm PRAYING that nothing but Jesus will be on the new album, PRAYING.

Anyway, it's not that I really care this much. It's just that listening to Over the rain makes me way too much EMOTIONAL.

*ohsopissedoff*

To-dos.

1. Thank this wonderful blogger that enlightened me about the only Chacha-san work(generally known, at least) I didn't have any ANY single clue about: Girluneed.

*Applause*

2. Remember that this year I'll turn 25. Yup, I'm not an age-con (yes, a brand new word for a brand new year! enjoy.), but the thing scares me.

3. Beg any single deity from random cults to make that yen value INCREASE. I mean, do you know where we were just a year ago? ONE HUNDRED SIXTY!!! SIXTY, I SAY!

4. Kill the neighbor cats. I love animals, pretty all the animal kingdom. Not those demons. They're NOT animals, so I can kill them. Simple.

----

Now, girluneed. So... Basically, I think that Marcy-san can*cough*should*cough* sing anything he likes. His voice is like that. Astonishing, in my opinion. And it has been like that in the last...25 years? Amazing. I can even overcome his posing attitude thanks to his voice ^^;
On the other hand, girluneed suck. Yeah, I'm saying this VOLUNTARILY(don't worry, I checked for it on the dictionary). I don't know, it's not that bad, but it's not even that good. Sure I have a future as a music critic, don't you think?

Like, take Ded Chaplin. I wasn't very much enthralled at first, especially by Niihara-san's voice, but if I kept listening means that there was something I liked and I still like. Setting aside Rock 'n' Roll hero, of course X°D
This time is quite different. I can't find a reason to keep listening to them. I mean, not even Chacha-san's solo parts(nothing really thrilling about it, unfortunately)! It's so strange...Like, I prefer Earthshaker! Come on, Earthshaker...!(At least the first two albums, then all become dizzy but mostly BORING) Not mentioning Chacha-san has nothing to do with ES (really...did I have to mention it the same?)
----

You know? I'm beginning to like *whispering*Bloody Monday. Maybe because for the last 9 xD eps I wasn't too much focused on the plot, so now everything seems so new to me X°D
----

Forget that thing about killing cats: I'll kill their owners, instead.

Frankly.

I don't think Genet-san is Kiss Relish vocalist.

Since Genet-san (if my ears work properly, and that's not quite sure) has some kind of speech impediment on s...or sort of... that Kiss Relish singer didn't have.

So tricky!

So useless fangirlism!

If Kagamin read this, I'm sure she would complain on how much I'm wasting energy on this instead of study/work properly.

Yes, I need a Lucky Star 2nd season.

Deal with it.

Taking advantage of the recent peak of fangirlism, I would like to begin this post with a very very very appropriate musical quote:

"It can't be true,
it can't be true,
it can't be true,
it can't be true.
It can't be true,
it can't be true,
it can't be true,
it can't be true..."

And so on. Got the subtle message?

IT CAN'T BE TRUE!

Kuroshitsuji has turned into a 26 eps series. I strongly hope it's a typo. Or a time-space distortion. Armageddon. A Visitors plane to destroy Earth and humanity. BUT NOT 23 MORE EPS TO TRANSLATE!!!!

So...

... renewed Dears site is finally up. *imagine this said with the PLAINEST tone ever*

Well, the RPG-like thing is cute, heavy of course xD but, at least, don't show all your overseas fans things that they cannot achieve, thank you.

I feel way pissed off, seeing things like "Chacha's house" (I beg your pardon, but X°DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD hilarious is not enough, definitely not enough), or You one, or all the other things and not being able to enter is like when you were a little child and older ones played all those wonderful "grown-up" games (in my case was monopoly) and you're not allowed to join the fun.

It's so pathetically sad.

I mean, I don't give a damn in being a FULL FLEDGED Gackt fan, I'm happy enough to being able to listen to his music from enough far for not caring about ALL the commercial things that sorrounds him, thanks, but come on!

Such a neat work *-* Yes I'm fighting between anger and delighment X°D

I mean II, this thing is really well done! Good job staff!

Well, let the sad music fade in as I leave the room with a sad look on my face, a tear slowly wetting my PALE xD cheek and my head low. Obviously walking SLOWLY, and sighing.

Ah...

It's not like...

... I'm a bad person. Well, I know there are SO MANY better persons than me in this world and beyond.

I'm just tired. Deadly tired (so snuuuuuuub). But I'm really tired. And why? I need a work. What a grey reason. And that what makes me pissed off the most.

Gray.

By the way, Toradora is lovely.

Reviews that onestly I could spare you #4

- Bloody Monday (2008, Japanese drama - what else? xD)
- starring: Haruma Miura. Haruma Miura. Haruma Miura. Anyone else? No? Good.

Some time ago, drama producers had a problem: how can we show the beautiful fangirl-catcher(and hugely talented, in my opinion) Haruma Miura-san in his wonderful appereance, building at least a bearable drama around him without making the audience notice?

Simple.

Producing an action, mistery, thrilling, slightly gorish but mostly DRAMATICALLY fast-paced drama. With MILLIONS of dramatic, oblique, dark shots of our beloved Haruma-san. See? I'm not complaining about this.

Yes. Cool. Except for the fact that this drama is QUITE boring. Really. Maybe it's because I really don't like this kind of dramas, like:

A - "Shit! This bomb is about to explode! Get the people out this place! What the hell are you doing there, xxx? Didn't you listen? We're going to blow up soon!"

B - "No, wait. We have to try defuse this. IT'S OUR DUTY!!!"

and so on, always ending with the rookie successfully defusing the bomb. Gah.

Still, this review doesn't have any meaning AT ALL, since I'll watch this 'til its end.
By the way, did I already tell you that Haruma-kun is the main character?

Reviews that onestly I could spare you #3

- Yasuko to Kenji (Japanese drama, 2008)
- starring: various people. Kidding. First: Tabe Mikako-chan (and this is one of a PROUD -chan), Matsuoka Masahiro (I thought I've finally seen all the SMAP acting, but this one is a TOKIO one... oh well...), Hirosue Ryoko, and many more. A kanjani8 included. But that's not the point.

So, this drama sucks. WIDELY. It's stupid, more than silly, Hirosue-san plays her usual role, Matsuoka...I can't say if he's acting well or if he's just a dumbass. Seriously. Sure he's not Tomoya-kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun. The thing that pisses me off the most is that Tabe's talent is totally wasted on a ASSHOLE role, showing what she's not: a standard teen. She's not a standard teen! At least give her a slightly darker role, not such a PINK little girl. Ah...Totally wasted.

Of course I'm still watching it. Well, it was a batch download. I don't think that I would download the next episode if it was a one by one thing. It's a sort of My boss my hero but less funny and heartwarming. It should be like that, they tried to make it like that.

BUT THEY FAILED.